How to find a true friend and how it should be. How to make friends in life: overcoming shyness together! How to find friends psychology

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Each person must satisfy the need for communication. It is important. Since without communication it is very difficult to feel the fullness of life. Naturally, there are exceptions, such as hermits, who can easily live alone. But we are talking about the general population of our planet, who need friends and loving fellowship.

And this article is for you, dear friends. If you are lonely and wish find good friends use these recommendations.

Strength in the first step.


Often the cause of loneliness is. And also pride. And in order to find friends, you need to MAKE ONLY THE FIRST STEP. Go on your own and invite people you'd like to befriend to spend time with you.

Remember that it is better to do something than to sit in four walls and suffer from emptiness, filling it with food and cigarettes.

And even if they refuse you, there is nothing wrong with that. Just make the following attempts to .

The ability to give.


The second reason for not having friends is not being able to share. Some people are consumers. They only want to take and give nothing in return. This attitude leads to loneliness. And in order to have friends, you need to give them love, attention, support, kind words, smiles ...

Only mutual giving and receiving can make you a good friend that people will be drawn to.

The study of the laws of communication.


The third reason for the lack of friends is not the ability to communicate. Some people have this ability from birth, it is in their blood. And some people need to learn a little. Read a book (you don't need a lot, one or two good ones are enough) Study it, and most importantly, PRACTICE. You can be like training, but you should not abuse them either ...

A few simple tips


Build relationships with old friends, as well as find new ones. Now a lot of opportunities are provided by the Internet, newspapers and television.

Naturally, the best acquaintances are casual. Therefore, in order to find good friends, be away from home as often as possible. Go to study courses, sign up for a fitness club, go to work.

In fact, there is no need to complicate things, and the truth is in simplicity. And these recommendations are the keys to finding good friends. And the most important thing is your own actions. Just start making an effort to find nice people, and soon you will have loving companionship and fullness in life.

I sincerely wish you this.

In the meantime, you don’t have company, don’t be upset, find out how you can spend your leisure time with yourself (himself)

How to find new friends

At every stage of human life, anyone is faced with the concept of "friendship".

Friendship does not have a specific description, everyone has their own vision of friendship. For some, this is just communication, for some, mutual assistance and assistance, for some, common interests.

But the main guarantee of friendship is disinterestedness.

So how do you find friends?

Why are friends needed?

The need for communication, for the disclosure of secrets, in the common interest has always been important and necessary. It's nice when a friend understands and shares the opinion, gives advice or, on the contrary, dissuades from stupid things.

You can have a bunch of friends who will not stay in difficult times and will not support, and just one friend who can break loose from anywhere in the world to console.

It is for these qualities that true friendship is valued.

How to find a friend?

It is rare that someone carries friendship through the years, because views, interests, life itself change, and it often breeds in different directions. It's not often that you meet high school friends who you can turn to after 20 or 30 years. And if there are, it is a great happiness.

In the modern world, there are many ways to find interlocutors, communication with which can develop into friendship:

Forums and sites. If you have certain interests, you can find excellent interlocutors on thematic forums.

Events. Of course, everyone's favorite parties and public events, such as concerts.

Of course, it is better to exclude people with immoral behavior and a bad attitude towards others from your social circle. Such people are not capable of bringing anything good to life.

Who to look for?

In addition to similar interests, there should be many other topics for communication. After all, gossip sharing is also a kind of communication.

To find a good friend, you should start with yourself:

  • Be polite and friendly.
  • Optimism and emotional stability. Openness always attracts people.
  • Expanding horizons. Communication with the discussion of only the work of Kant can quickly get bored. You should always be open to new knowledge.

How to behave with a friend.

So, the goal is achieved, and a friend is found. While people get to know each other better, you should follow a few rules:

1. Less shy. Silence is good only if people understand each other without words. And unfamiliar people try to learn more about the interlocutor and understand whether he can become a good friend. It is better not to use such answers as “clearly”, “clearly” at first. It is much better to ask questions and listen, and in response to talk about yourself.

2. Time. Many people take a short amount of time to digest the information and decide if this person is suitable for the role of a permanent friend and can be trusted.

3. Distance. It is worth keeping yourself in check and not throwing yourself at a person with hugs at the second meeting. It is possible that he will feel uncomfortable in this case, and inappropriate touches will spoil the impression of the last meeting.

How not to behave with a friend.

Sometimes words or actions done towards another person can hurt him. Therefore, you need to be careful, even if a person has long been a good friend and almost a family member.

1. Don't pick on. Any criticism can painfully affect a friend, it is worth choosing expressions and gently arguing your position.

2. Reciprocity. One of the pillars of friendship. If a person does not see returns, then one of the two is a bad friend.

3. Don't forget. Even if life has separated on different sides of the barricades, it is worth remembering friends, writing, calling, congratulating you on holidays.

4. The second half and friends. Of course, with the appearance of personal life, friends fade into the background. If you can’t communicate with everyone together, you still shouldn’t forget about a friend. It often happens that friendship develops into a mutual feeling. Then an awkward situation with whom to spend time does not arise.

It is good when there are many friends, and they will always come to the rescue in any situation.

How to make friends after 35

School and student years are long gone, now you have a career and family in the first place. One day you notice that on your day off you have no one to go for a walk or go to football with. If old friends are busy or they don’t exist at all, look for new ones.

Is it possible to make friends when you are over 30?

In the days when we were schoolchildren or students, friends made themselves. No wonder, because we spent with our classmates from 20 to 40 hours a week for many years. Then this time passes, and we communicate less and less with our school friends. We work day and night, start families, go on various business trips. Then we come to the fact that we don’t even have anyone to walk with. Family contact is not enough for us. Many people are looking for people at this age, and they will tell you that it is not easy.

Where can you find a friend of interest?

First you need to decide on a social network. Now there are a huge number of them, each of them has its own functions. Some networks focus on dating, and some on professional communication, where they are looking for colleagues, not friends. The best choice for finding friends is the "MyFriends" network. A feature of this service is that the search for friends is carried out by geolocation and interests.

Sign up for a real account with your real name. As in life, in social networks people get to know each other, while giving their real name. Set your real photo, do not hide behind a mask of cats or cars.

The more information you share about yourself in your profile, the more likely you are to find friends. Fill out your profile to the maximum and then people with similar interests will definitely find you.

Post more pictures with your hobbies, fill in hashtags for them. The better you design it, the more likely it is to be seen by people with similar interests. Perhaps these people will be your friends.

Be more active on the MyFriends social network, start chatting with people first, get to know them and discuss everything in the world. In the future, what prevents two Internet friends with similar interests from the same city from becoming real friends?

Write on the network that you want to join the company or one person for tonight, for example, go to the movies or to a cafe. In MyFriends, this option is called "Wishes".

How to find friends in Odnoklassniki?

Welcome to the web! lessons for those who wish to find their distant classmates

Not many years have passed since the launch of the social project in March 2006. Nevertheless, today it is difficult to imagine the life of society without such a phenomenon as the Odnoklassniki social network. Now it is the most highly visited resource in Russia. The founder of the network, web developer Albert Popkov, did not plan that his offspring would grow into such a profitable business. The service was created as a hobby, almost like entertainment.

Quite unexpectedly for their creators, already in December 2006, the number of users of the Odnoklassniki network. ru approached a million. And this despite the fact that the first years of registration was paid. And yet, people found in the service something that was not there before, but that people badly needed.

And they needed to return their past, childhood, youth, school and student years. That was the main task. The social network has been specifically designed to help people quickly find lost connections with loved ones. To find a person, you need to specify all the data that is stored in memory or records.

And then, the system will find a person at least on the other side of the planet. Often, over time, even surnames and names are erased from memory, so many years have passed since the moment of parting. For such complex cases, the Odnoklassniki social network has a special search for photos. You need to enter, as accurately as possible, local data and then look for a similar face among the shown telegraphs.

Over time, network services have expanded and improved. Now the social network Odnoklassniki login is adapted not only for finding old acquaintances, but also for creating new contacts, finding friends by interests or meeting people of the opposite sex.

There is a special dating service where thousands of men and women have already found their destiny and created families. Odnoklassniki helps some people to establish business contacts or look for a job. There are also funny cases.

Cunning bailiffs and proofreading agencies have adapted to look for debtors, malicious defaulters in the network. Of course, to the poor fellows themselves, with unpaid debts, this does not seem funny.

In fact, the social network Odnoklassniki Entrance does not encourage intrusion into the privacy of users and makes serious efforts to protect personal data. Today it is possible to close access to the information contained in the profile for all outside visitors, leaving free entry only for the specified friends. Initially, the Odnoklassniki social network provided most of the additional services on a paid basis.

As the network develops, the number of free features is constantly growing. At the beginning of 2013, over 150 million accounts were registered on the network. In Runet, the social network is the undisputed leader among similar services. The reasons for such an amazing success and the widest popularity of the service are seen in the true nationality of the project, in its proximity to the mentality of the vast majority of the inhabitants of our country. You are not online yet - Then classmates are waiting for you!

Outcome

To find friends, it is important to act. Firstly, it is worth overcoming the pattern of loneliness and going out more often, meeting people, taking 1 steps. Secondly, use the Internet, through social networks to look for old friends and new ones.

But most importantly, it is important to love people, to be open and friendly.

Take the initiative in your own hands. When it's time to find a true friend, you can't afford to be lazy. A true friend won't miraculously show up at your doorstep, so it takes a little effort on your part. Take the search for a true friend into your own hands and start connecting with people.

  • Stop waiting for others to do all the work for you. Gather them and ask if you can go to the event with them, or organize it yourself.
  • Don't be afraid to appear hopeless and needy. Focus on yourself and your goal. If, in the end, this method works, who will remember your problems?

Meet new people. You can’t make friends by constantly sitting at home alone in the evenings. You need to be constantly active, so force yourself to go out and at home and meet as many people as possible. At first, you will be a little uncomfortable, but your efforts will not be in vain.

  • One of the easiest ways is to find a new friend with the help of an existing one. Go to a party or social event. Let your friend give you advice.
  • You can meet people based on your studies or interests. As a rule, friends have common interests, so those people with whom you met at school or a circle are potential applicants for your friend's place.
  • Meet people at work. Perhaps you have a work colleague with whom you are familiar, but you have never had fun together. It's time to do it.
  • Meet people online. There are certain prejudices associated with online dating, but it's actually a great way to get to know each other. Blogs, social media, and forum comments are great methods of socialization.
  • Do not take everything that happens to heart. When you first meet, people may seem very callous to you. It may seem that they are not interested and do not want to make an effort on themselves. It seems to you that you got along, but nothing is heard from your new acquaintance. Finding a true friend takes a lot of time.

  • Don't be too demanding. Communicate sincerely with your new acquaintance when you meet. If you're trying to befriend someone, being picky isn't the best strategy. Your first priority is to get to know as many people as possible, so be sincere with your people.

    • Even if you meet a person with whom you think you can have nothing in common, talk to him and give him a chance.
    • You will never be able to recognize a true friend at first sight. First you need to get to know the person, so take every chance!
  • Be persistent. If at the first appearance of your hopes did not materialize, do not despair! People need to be given a little time to get inspired, so the second and third meeting with the same person usually goes much better than the first.

    • If you invite someone to a meeting, don't be discouraged if the person can't come. If he politely declined, it's not because he doesn't like you. There are still chances. Wait a week or two and then ask to meet again.
    • In the case of some people, this number does not work, and this is normal. Imagine that you are thus preparing for a meeting with a real friend.
  • Be patient. It takes time to get to know a person, especially if you are looking for a soul mate. If you keep going out of the house and meeting different people, eventually you will find a person with whom you will truly connect.

    • Be realistic. This is especially true for the amount of time that will have to be spent on getting to know a person. Of course, you can put aside all doubts when you get the feeling that you have known a person for about ten years, and you talked with him for only ten minutes. This process usually takes longer. Much depends on how often you attend various events.
    • In certain situations, you can quickly make new friends. For example, you went to college, moved to a new city, or became a member of a sports team.
  • I have my own social circle. These are my good friends who are also into social dynamics. We perfectly understand each other perfectly. These are my friends and just good people. I love to communicate with them, share value and relax together.

    1. Get rid of those who pull you down and prevent you from growing.

    It doesn't matter to me whether a person has many friends or few. It's not the main thing for me.

    When I started meeting new people and changing myself, I completely stopped communicating with old friends. They prevented me from developing, they did not understand me and pulled me down into the old reality..

    I stopped seeing them, calling them. I didn't regret it one bit. I seemed to have thrown heavy stones from my shoulders. I have no problems with how to find friends with the same interests.

    I was alone in the field warrior! Alone I felt great! I didn't need anyone. I was fine alone. Every day I made new acquaintances with girls, I met many interesting people.

    2. Your freedom and self-love will attract the same people.

    When people they see this independence in you, they are drawn to you. This freedom is very attractive to people.

    But to have this attraction, you have to be interesting!

    Passion must live in you, love for yourself! And the same people will be attracted to you.

    3. Don't be afraid to meet new people

    If you are boring, then it's time to change, if you don't want to be surrounded by the same boring people. To find good friends love to interact with people and be social.

    Like attracts like. Appearance attracts appearance. An interesting personality, its depth will attract the same interesting and deep people.

    Always be open to new acquaintances. I am always glad if a stranger comes up to me on the street or anywhere and wants to talk to me. I see good qualities in people and feel their pleasant energy.

    My own personal standards


    5. Places to meet cool people

    Clubs and parties

    Many good friends can be quickly found in the club. There are always a lot of people there and this is the place where making friends is easy. Chat in the club not only with girls, but also with guys.

    Surprisingly, but I did not look for my friends with whom I now communicate. They found me! No kidding. Now there are very interesting guys around me. I went out to the club, and the guys themselves came up to me and got to know each other. They already knew what I was doing. Perhaps they saw me meeting people.

    We communicate, I see that the person is interesting, and we exchange contacts. We can call next time, go to the club together and get to know each other better. This is how people become friends. Everything happens very easily.

    Social networks: post more photos and information about yourself

    Sometimes guys write to me on social networks and invite me to go out to hang out together. I agree even though I don't know them. We go out, I see who they are, and if I like these people, we continue to communicate and keep in touch.

    I have posted on social networks a lot of my photos from clubs, with friends, with girls, from other cities, football freestyle and others. Looking at my pictures, people understand who I am, who I am with and how I like to spend time.. I am open at the same time. I have nothing to hide.

    But always remember: don't get in the habit of meeting online often! I don't like chatting online at all.

    You should be able to get to know each other live - just walk up and start talking anywhere. It is when you meet face to face that you really get to know a person, and not through the Internet.

    Go to places that suit your subjective tastes and hobbies

    Go to a place you like and start chatting. If you like to read, then the library is also an interesting place where it is not difficult to find friends. Maybe you'll find your best friend there. It's that simple! It is communication that opens the gate to the unknown for you.

    6. How to build social circles so that people themselves introduce you to friends

    Very useful to know!

    • 1 level. You come to an unfamiliar place. You don't know anyone. You walk up and get to know everyone.
    • 2 level. You make a quality social circle. You choose from a large number of people the most interesting and attractive to you.
    • 3 level. This social circle works for you, and already they introduce you to other people.

    If you are social and communicate with all people, then you are a high-status man. This means that people want to watch you approach and interact with other people.

    The next video of the social dynamics trainer is Alex. The first minute and a half can be squandered. He travels the world and his friends are always by his side. During his adventures around the world, Alex goes to parties, meets beautiful girls, and hangs out with them. In life, it is very easy for him to find a friend for communication.

    And motivation to act - the whole truth about how to be motivated throughout life + motivating video.

    Girls - top 5 useful rules for dating a beauty.

    How guys dance in the club and on the street: videos of funny dances.

    7. Be confident without friends, and then they will be there.

    Your self-confidence should not depend on whether you have friends or not! If you do not know how to walk and have fun without friends, then your reality is based on external factors. This is bad. No matter how many friends you have, you must be strong and confident without them..

    Number of friends and numbers give you temporary situational certainty. Know how to go to clubs, walk and seek adventures without friends. You are still self-sufficient without them.

    8. Face your fears: independence is a magnet.

    Don't let external circumstances stop you. Go to your goal!

    When you face your fears ALONE, you grow much faster and stronger.! This is how you will be independent, people will be drawn to you and want to be around. This is how you can find true friends.

    9. Be prepared to lose everyone: being alone is not shameful

    To make a lot of new friends, you need to be ready to lose everyone and be left alone.. You don't have to be afraid of being alone. I don't like it when people cling to me and seem to sit on my shoulders.

    With the most interesting and nice girls that I really like, I always keep in touch. I am sincere with them, and I always say that I love girls. I meet them, I walk, I am silent, I laugh, I drown in their gaze.

    10. I am the main actor in this film, I am the screenwriter in it, I am the director

    Recognize and implement the following beliefs:

    1. You choose your own environment!
    2. It is you who decides with whom you will communicate, and with whom you will not.
    3. The world is your cinema and your film! You are the main character in it and write the script of your film yourself!

    It seems that life is well-established, and there are interests, hobbies, but it’s still somehow boring and empty in my soul ... It’s good when you have a friend with whom you can share joy, sadness, talk about life. There are colleagues at work, acquaintances, but all this is not the same ... Therefore, what is wrong with me and how to find friends for someone like me? are far from idle questions.

    Here is Vasya - he drives a cool car, he has a business, business, acquaintances. That's who is not bored, although he is a rare redneck. But he has a lot of messages on the page, he is chatting with someone all day, and at least someone wrote to me. And the weather is so good outside, but there is no one to walk with. Even the neighbors are all different. One is crazy - she fiddles with her cats all day long, and the other is a bore like the world has never seen: she always teaches me how to live.

    How to find new friends for a normal person, let's try to figure it out with the help of Yuri Burlan's System-Vector Psychology.

    birds of a feather flock together

    Today, even in the age of the Internet, the issue of finding friendships remains relevant and very important for many. We get along with people thanks to common views on life, common hobbies at work, on vacation, while traveling, on the Internet ... What brings us together?

    The system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan distinguishes people by vectors - groups of psychological properties and desires. A person with an anal vector will perfectly understand the owner of the same vector, because they have the same world outlook. And if they also grew up together, it’s for life. Friendship is the most important thing for them!

    Two skinners will get along well with each other, especially if it is necessary for the case. A person with a skin vector makes connections and necessary acquaintances, and sincerely can consider a successful acquaintance a good friend.

    For visual people, emotional connection is very important, they are kind, sensitive natures, ready to listen, understand, regret. The viewer will be a sensitive and sympathetic friend.

    A person with a sound vector always has selective contact. To be his friend is to earn the highest trust. Such an introvert will open only to those who understand him, but not everyone can understand. Two sound engineers definitely have something to talk about and keep quiet.

    Where to find friends

    As we have already understood, people find friends when their interests, values ​​and aspirations coincide. And if you understand what kind of person is in front of you, then you will not demand the impossible from him. It remains only to understand yourself, to take an inventory of your own values, to throw out the imposed and leave your own. And then finding a friend will not be difficult.

    Start with like-minded people with the same hobbies as you. In any city and village there are places where people of the same interests gather for communication. Register on forums that interest you and post your thoughts without hesitation. Believe me, there will be those who are looking for the same thing as you. And you will have someone to talk to.

    Who are you and what are you striving for? Answer these questions for yourself, and for true desires there will always be a true road and real companions. The main thing is not to rush things, because friendship needs time to get stronger.

    The question of how to find a friend disappears by itself at the training in system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan. Having learned new thinking, everyone acquires the ability to see, hear and understand people as they really are - a whole world with its troubles, joys, secrets, riddles, desires, goals. And among these destinies and worlds, finding new friends is not at all difficult, but on the contrary, it is simple and pleasant.

    mask i know you

    Learning to think systematically, you discover that the skin Vasya is not a goon at all, but simply by nature so dexterous, nimble, easy-going. A neighbor with an anal vector is not at all a brake or a bore, but a very serious, decent and thorough person with high values ​​​​in life. And the soundman, walking by with a blank look, is actually suffering from insomnia or, even worse, from depression, and he simply needs a friend. And that this visual person, forever kissing with her cats, actually suffers from loneliness. She really needs a friend, but she is afraid to relive the bitterness of loss ...

    Realizing the world anew, it suddenly turns out that someone needed just such a friend as you. To date, thousands of people have been able to change their lives with the help of Yuri Burlan's system-vector psychology, find new relationships or improve old ones. Discover new meanings and start all over again.


    “... My eyes opened. I began to understand myself and other people. The process of interacting with people has reached a completely different level. I became interested in talking. I noticed that I was running to meet people. That I have a joyful anticipation of interacting with other people. The process of interaction became so simple and harmonious that I could not believe in this miracle...

    Knowledge of the nature of the unconscious turned out to be universal knowledge. And skill. I never thought that training would give me so many results. It is no exaggeration to say that he taught me everything. Understand yourself and people, build relationships, raise children, understand the nature of psychosomatic diseases ... "
    Tatiana K., St. Petersburg

    “... I realized that before that I didn’t love and didn’t make friends, I didn’t KNOW, I didn’t SEE people around. While this was happiness, the realization that I had been looking for for so long. Now I am happy to continue to comprehend a new quality of life, thinking, perception, which is given at the training in Systemic Vector Psychology ... "
    Anastasia Sh., Cyprus

    From loneliness to meeting one step

    We are all different, but we all want to be understood, loved, accepted as we are. And it's all really simple. If you want friendship, become someone else's friend. Start with your neighbor, with your neighbor. After all, you just have to look closely, and you can see your own shortcomings and virtues in your neighbor, and accept him as he is. And it will become so easy on the soul that all that remains is to reach out and say - Hello, friend!

    All this can be learned at the training in system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan. Get a new outlook on life and get what previously seemed impossible. Change yourself and one day see that you yourself have become someone's true friend.


    Nothing is impossible in the world, and only one decision and one click separates us from a new life. Register for a free online training in system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan using the link

    The article was written using materials from online trainings on system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan